Ali Brown #SHINE Debrief From a 2009 Diamond … Part 1

diamondIt’s hard to believe it’s been nearly a year since I sat in Ali Brown’s Online Success Blueprint Workshop and applied for her elite $100,000 diamond mentorship program.

This past weekend at Ali’s SHINE event, I sat on stage as part of Ali’s diamond success panel and couldn’t stop the tears from flowing as I thought about the past year and how happy I was to be sitting there as a symbol of hope for the hundreds of women in the audience.

Only a year ago, I was so confused about my identity.  Mommy blogger?  Lawyer?  TV personality?  Author?  CEO? Something else entirely that I couldn’t even see yet?

Today, I realize my identity is not what matters at all. (Anne McKevitt, Ali’s mentor, would surely disagree.  But, that’s a whole ‘nother long blog post.)

What matters is who and how I serve.

Here are a few more of the big awarenesses I’ve gained over the past year:

  • For the first time in ten years, I have discovered that first and foremost, I want to be with my kids a whole lot more.  I realize that in many ways I’ve used my work as a way to escape from the pressures of motherhood. Today, I’m a homeschooling mom and I want to be the one to teach my children how to be in the world.
  • Over the past year, I’ve discovered how to relax into my feminine energy much more deeply.  I can finally stop trying to make things happen and allow.
  • I’ve learned to say no to myself and others.  My value no longer comes from all of the things I can do.  It comes from saying yes to what I love to do and letting go of everything else.  Even when that’s scarier than heck.
  • I’ve learned to set boundaries with an open heart.  At our first diamond meeting in Phoenix last year, I was in the process of closing my law firm after having sold it to a man who ultimately could not fulfill on the commitments he had made.  The diamonds helped me to see that what I was experiencing was a reflection of my lack of clear boundaries.  And that boundaries didn’t have to mean what I thought they did.  I could set boundaries and keep my heart open at the same time.  What a revelation!
  • I discovered that often the path to playing big requires me to think a whole lot smaller than I’m used to, at least temporarily.  That’s a whole blog post in itself to explain.
  • I’ve learned to stop doing so much.  Looking back at what I was letting go of last year, I did it – I let go of so much:
  1. I stopped trying to fit myself into a box;
  2. I unfollowed everyone I was following on Twitter and now only follow people I want to connect with regularly;
  3. I turned my email inbox over to my amazing assistant Michelle;
  4. I no longer spend anytime on facebook looking up old highschool peeps;
  5. The lawsuit has been long settled and the law firm itself has been closed for several months.
  • And I recognize that I’m still doing too much.

Did I have to invest $100,000 to have these discoveries?  Apparently, I did.

Many people have asked me if the investment was worth it.  Before I answer the question, I’ll ask you.  Especially if you saw me at SHINE this weekend.

Does it seem like it was worth it?

Photo courtesy of Flickr


  1. Phil DyerMonday, November 9, 2009 at 2:57 am 

    Alexis – It was a pleasure meeting you at SHINE this weekend and I just want to honor your transparency and everything you shared at the event about what’s going on personally and professionally. Based on the vibe I got from you…I think your first bullet…the one about connecting with the desire to REALLY spend time with your kids was worth the whole Diamond investment. The rest is just gravy :-)!

    I look forward to continuing our discussions and creating more space for you to do even less.

    All the best,

    Phil Dyer

  2. Michele LittleMonday, November 9, 2009 at 3:28 am 

    Hi Alexis,
    While we didn’t have the chance to connect personally at shine it was truly inspiring to hear you speak of your journey. You have come a long way – both personally and professionally – and your family will surely reap the benefits! All the Diamond members did truly shine and gave me the hope and the inspiration I need to take my business – and myself – to the next level. I wish you all the best in your continued journey.


  3. Kevin HouchinMonday, November 9, 2009 at 4:12 am 

    You should be VERY proud of yourself Alexis – especially the part about relaxing into your natural energy. The more you surrender to that, the greater your power to serve.

  4. Lisa ScottMonday, November 9, 2009 at 2:47 pm 

    You and the other Diamond members were an incredible inspiration to me this weekend. I grew up in the 80’s, where it seemed women had the choice of being the nurturing stay at home mom or the hard-nosed, suit-wearing business woman. I have traveled the reverse path of your life, having spent the last 15 years mostly at home and homeschooling my kids, working part-time. Though I’ve been excited about building my business, I feared that there was a trade-off between being a great mom and a great business woman, and this has kept me from stepping wholeheartedly into my business. What I saw this weekend was that there is no tradeoff for those who are pursuing their passion. It is our opportunity to Shine to the fullest. Thank you so much for your candidness!! Truly it was a life-changing mindset shift for me!

  5. coachtiaThursday, December 3, 2009 at 12:24 pm 

    Yes, I would say it seems it was worth it. There's a peaceful energy around you and these words that just shine through 🙂 Tia @TiaSparkles

  6. coachtiaThursday, December 3, 2009 at 6:24 pm 

    Yes, I would say it seems it was worth it. There's a peaceful energy around you and these words that just shine through 🙂 Tia @TiaSparkles

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