So Far From Perfect … How the Catalyst Came to Be

Perception is so interesting.  I received some feedback via twitter about my Oprah audition.

My twitter friend said I came across as too perfect, as if I’ve never had problems.

Boy, is that far from the truth.

My show concept for the Catalyst comes from the reality of my own life.  My own divorce, conflicts with employees and business partners.  My kids’ conflicts with each other.  My extended family’s conflicts after deaths in the family.

In fact, now that I think about it, it really all started with my parent’s divorce.

I remember feeling like a ping pong in the middle of their bickering.  Neither of them could see I was the last one who should be helping them work through their issues.

Maybe that’s because it was all part of the bigger picture – I was in early training for what was to come later … this show, the Catalyst.

The Catalyst is about seeing that all conflict is the greatest opportunity to be more of who you are.  Conflict isn’t something to be avoided.  It’s to be confronted.  With love and an open heart.

We need the tools for this.  It’s not the norm in our world.  But, it can be.

It’s not easy, by any means.  It could be though, with the right tools.  All it takes is a new perspective.  A shift in awareness.  Seeing what you could not previously see.

So no, definitely not perfect.  But, I do believe thanks to my experiences perfectly suited to host this show and make an impact in this way.

And it’s also why I think the reality show aspect of Oprah’s Your Own Show contest is so right for me.  I need work to make my show as great as it can possibly as be – and I believe it begins with allowing more of my authentic, true, anything but perfect self to shine through.

If I truly believe that all conflict is your greatest opportunity to be more of who you are, what better way to experience that than with a reality show/contest where conflict is almost certain to be a given.


  1. Amy MiyamotoTuesday, July 6, 2010 at 4:31 pm 

    For much of my life I was definitely a conflict avoider. And part of what has shifted my ability to embrace confronting conflict as an opportunity to lovingly grow and expand has been through glimpsing it through the lens that you share around it from so many personal and professional angles. You are leading the way to a new paradigm my friend!

  2. Samantha FlickTuesday, July 6, 2010 at 4:34 pm 

    When I heard the idea for your show, I thought it was a brilliant vehicle for you to showcase your purpose and make change. And then I saw the video.

    Please excuse the bluntness about to ensue; I am coming from a place of love and attempting to be helpful.

    It felt forced and scripted. It even made me feel uncomfortable. It aroused in my mind, the words “cheesy” and “fake.” Not the content, but the way it was delivered. It was not at all what I expected from the heartfelt description of what it was supposed to be and I feel like you got caught up in professionalism so much so that YOU couldn't come through.

    You, the Alexis everyone knows and loves.

    I think the footage needed to be more raw- just you coaching people for real, maybe for hours so that you could act natural, ignore the cameras, the lights & your appearance and truly display the passion in you we're all so fond of. And then just edit it down. I would also recommend toning down the makeup/accessories next time, as they were distracting. The set (maybe due to the lighting) looked like scenery from a play.

    Regardless, it took a lot of courage to take this on & really go for it, and as always, I am in utter admiration of you! This project is one I believe in, so long as you keep growing and allow everyone's feedback to penetrate your blind spots.

  3. Naomi NilesWednesday, July 7, 2010 at 3:15 am 

    I thought it was exceptionally well done. Well, actually, the very first thing I thought when I saw it was, “Alexis is meant to have her own show”. I mean it sincerely. Some of us are made for that and some aren't, but you obviously are AND you have much to share. I think that's a winning combo and if anyone deserves it, it's you.

  4. alexisneelyWednesday, July 7, 2010 at 6:51 am 

    This is awesome feedback Sami. I love the honesty and the perspective. Definitely working on finding that balance between the real me and the TV me. This helps a lot.

  5. alexisneelyWednesday, July 7, 2010 at 6:51 am 

    Thank you Naomi! So appreciate your support always.

  6. alexisneelyWednesday, July 7, 2010 at 6:51 am 

    Oh, Amy, thank you for sharing how your perspective has changed through my work. So grateful.

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