When Life and Business Collide

Bowled over by all your well wishes on the marriage.  Thank you.  We are so happy.  And, most importantly, my children are so happy.

We told them on Saturday night at Agape right after Russell finished a sound healing session (Noah actually sat still and watched Russell play music for about 30 minutes!) and they were so happy.  It’s as if they have been waiting for this and silently sighed when they heard.

I’ve been silently sighing myself quite a bit lately.

There are two things I’m struggling a bit with though:

1. Dave

Our relationship has become strictly business.  At first glance, I miss the personal aspect of our relationship.  I miss hearing how he’s doing and what he’s doing.  I understand why it has to be this way for now, but I still miss it.

Upon deeper reflection, I recognize there’s a part of me that believe’s there’s something wrong.

Fortunately, the bigger part of me knows the truth – we are here to evolve our souls and what’s unfolding is exactly what is necessary for the highest and deepest evolution of each of us.

I will be attending our last Dave and Alexis event in Atlanta.  It’s an invite only workshop for our clients and it wouldn’t have felt right not to be there.

If I know Dave, I suspect he’ll be ready to lighten things up a bit by the time I get there (two weeks from now) and he’ll be back to telling jokes at my expense or his own about the breakup throughout the entire event.  At least I hope so.

2.  SobCon Colorado

I was scheduled to be on an awesome panel with Jonathan Fields on Saturday morning.  For some reason, I thought the panel was on Friday night and I agreed to be in LA on Saturday evening for a ceremony with Russell.

I was looking up the event info to get it to one of my CO friends so they could attend (by the way, you should totally attend if you are a CO business owner/service professional/entrepreneur) and saw my speaking time at 11am on Saturday.

Oh crap!  11am?  My flight from Denver to LA was scheduled for 9am!  I called the airline and the last flight out I could get and still make the ceremony was 1p, which wouldn’t be possible with my 11am panel.

Oh, what to do?!?

A major conflict between life and business.

On the one hand, I would look like a total flake to several people in the business community I really want to respect me.

On the other, I just got married.  And I’m going to a ceremony in LA with my new husband.

I contacted Liz Strauss, one of the SobCon organizers, to see if there was any possibility of switching session times.  There wasn’t.

And, I had to choose.  Life or business.

I chose life over business even though it feels terrifying.

I can feel the little girl inside me.  She is so afraid of getting in trouble, doing something wrong.

She is absolutely mortified that I would back out of a commitment to speak at an event like this.  “What will people think?!?” she says.

“You’ll never live this down. You are forever a flake and will never be invited to speak ever again.”

I hear another, stronger voice though that says life and love come before business.  The people you want to do business with will get it – you just got married, celebrate!

We’ve got you, we still love you and we totally understand.

Yes, of course that’s right.  Once I write it out, I can see … yes.

Life and love first, business second, money third.

My people will understand that and love me through it.

Big breath.  Deep abiding trust.

Even though I can’t make SobCon on Saturday, I will be at the evening networking on Friday night.  I’d love to see you there.  If you can make it out to Colorado (or live here) attend the whole event.  World-class speakers, masterminding on your message, business models, social media and more. I’m bummed to miss it.

Where does your life and business collide and what do you do when it does?

13 Comments

  1. BethThursday, September 16, 2010 at 5:54 pm 

    Alexis- I appreciate and love how candid you are with your public audience.
    How healing it must be to reach out to the cyber-cosmos and know you have people identifying with and supporting, you.

    In the future- I’ll be reaching out to you to pick your brain about some business ideas I’ve got up my sleeve.

    In the meantime- hope PLG and I can do something fun with you!

    Beth

  2. Gloria Perez-WalkerThursday, September 16, 2010 at 8:46 pm 

    Love this! Thank you for writing it and I totally relate (can’t write more now otherwise I would). But so glad your children are happy. And celebrate, that’s what you should be doing right now! 🙂

  3. Christina MorassiFriday, September 17, 2010 at 12:10 am 

    Wow… Powerful post!!! Thank you so much for sharing your unfolding process with us, Alexis. It comes from such a generous heart.

    You know the thing that came up for me though… is what would it be like if life and business were actually one and the same??

    I totally get how they can be different… But since most of us are working to live into a both/and kind of world… rather than an either/or… I post this pondering here.

    I know it’s kind of a philosophical question in the moment… But it is an intention that I have been holding for myself, and am looking to live into eventually.

    That picture of colliding planets is so potent… I love it. And… I’m going to keep wondering about a beautiful image of business and life perfectly aligned and integrated, and see what happens!

    I’ll get back to you to let you know. 🙂

    Enjoy your weekend!

  4. AmethystFriday, September 17, 2010 at 1:40 am 

    Life and business here is like a MOSH pit – or maybe a big rich juicy stew – all the ingredients thrown into one pot and just turn up the FYRE a little underneath the whole thing to see what I can get to start bubbling…. When you live in the moment – it’s ALL Sacred – the challenge comes when you have to choose – when the heart is torn in two – as a single mom – deciding between delivering on service or having those sales conversations that put the bread on the table and the roof over the head vs. sitting with a child who is unwell and just wants to have some “mama” time – those are the heartbreaking moments. Been there – done that – still in the trenches.

    Loving your realness – congrats on your nuptials – looking forward to our time together tomorrow!

    Love lights us!

    Peace is in you….

    Amethyst

  5. SecFriday, September 17, 2010 at 3:04 am 

    re: when two worlds collide article, I am thouroughly confused now, nuptules strictly business kids happy…that does matter,
    as long as people are able to find happiness within their lives..life has rich moments…
    to answer the question in this article, I am, for the most part, able to separate business and personal since my business was destroyed by my ex-personal other and now all my personal time is most all consumed by re-inventing business in full effort to provide some form of income to survive. Interestingly enough there are not many men with such similar experiences I am in that seek out discussions or objective reasoning and I compare it to ISS isolation shock sydrome. An affliction that renders certain men into a world of alienism and isolation by disparity… Those very few I have met that have experienced similar circumstances in life changing events seem to most all, show similar character changes, myself included somwhere in the symptom mixes. What is incredible are all the sensory’s one can either numb ones self too or those experiences one can view openly and learn from. At some point, ISS sufferes have to pull their heads from the sands and understand, nothing changes for the good unless we make it and I say this as I feel the heat of all that is as it is disentigrating around me knowing now, I must leave the damages of everything flame and try best to move forward and re-grow as the phoenix from the ashes… what is rather a mystery that constantly holds my intel attentions are all the steps backwards I feel and all the steps forward I see, most are still a blurr… clarity to follow…where optimism lives, there is a key for every door…

  6. Skye KingFriday, September 17, 2010 at 11:14 am 

    Alexis,
    I made the decision close to two years ago to have my life with my daughter to be the #1 focus above my businesses, and I’m a total workaholic, so it’s been a ride. Today I can say, I am at peace with allowing the Universe to provide exactly what I create through the flow of grace and it provides an inner connectivity that brings my work to the world in such a deeper manner.
    I see this happening with you Alexis as you move deeper into your Spiritual calling with women, relationships, love and the practical. I am honored that you so openly share your life as you do, it gives me courage to do the same.
    Blessings,
    Skye King

  7. Skye KingFriday, September 17, 2010 at 11:14 am 

    Alexis,
    I made the decision close to two years ago to have my life with my daughter to be the #1 focus above my businesses, and I’m a total workaholic, so it’s been a ride. Today I can say, I am at peace with allowing the Universe to provide exactly what I create through the flow of grace and it provides an inner connectivity that brings my work to the world in such a deeper manner.
    I see this happening with you Alexis as you move deeper into your Spiritual calling with women, relationships, love and the practical. I am honored that you so openly share your life as you do, it gives me courage to do the same.
    Blessings,
    Skye King

  8. PCI ComplianceThursday, December 23, 2010 at 11:55 am 

    If I know Dave, I suspect he’ll be ready to lighten things up a bit by the time I get there (two weeks from now) and he’ll be back to telling jokes at my expense or his own about the breakup throughout the entire event. At least I hope so.

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