The Real Secret of the Law of Attraction and Manifestation

Several months ago, a friend I met through a mastermind program we were in together, Katherine C.H.E., invited me to be on the expert faculty of an association she was launching (now launched) call the International Association of Law of Attraction Professionals.

This Tuesday, I’m going to be teaching a class I developed just for Katherine’s association about building your business model using law of attraction principles.

Whether you join us on that class or not, I wanted to take a few minutes today to share with you one of the most overlooked principles of the law of attraction … and the one that’s really the most important one when it comes to manifestation in action.

If you’ve watched the movie the Secret or studied law of attraction at all, you know that the first step is to get clear about what it is that you want and create some sort of a visual representation of that desire, whether that be through a vision board, a written list or story.

You probably also know that the second step is to actually place yourself in the experience of what you want and multi-sensorily feel that experience as much as you possibly can.

As you can see, the steps get progressively more challenging … it can be challenging for many of us to be clear about what we want, it can be even more challenging to create a visual representation of that, and even more challenging yet to actual feel that thing happening for us.

The step after all that is the most challenging of all and it’s the primary reason many people say the law of attraction does not work … it’s because we become attached to what we think “it” should look like when we attract what we think we want.

The real secret of the law of attraction is that after you get clear about what you want, make your list or create your vision board, you must then let go of all of what you think it should look like when it shows up.

Release your attachment to the outcome.  It is only then that you make the space for what you want to show up.

Here’s a story from my own life that illustrates what this looks like:

You’ve heard me talk quite a bit about the business I founded that trains lawyers on how to attract, engage, service and retain clients using a new paradigm business model I created in my own law firm.

For years, I was very attached to what this business had to look like, how it had to be created, and what it had to do.

Just recently, I let go of that attachment.  I got clear about what I wanted – for my work to impact tens of thousands of lawyers and their clients – and I let go of whether it would happen or how it would happen.

As soon as I did, a man showed up who I believe may be the one to powerfully guide that business to maximum impact.

He was not who I expected him to be.

Had I remained attached to what I thought it needed to look like OR even to the outcome itself happening, I would not have made the space for him to show up.

Interestingly enough, when I mentioned this phenomenon to him, a guy who does not seem to be a law of attraction type of guy at all, he commented that it’s exactly what happened when he met his wife.  He stopped being attached to finding her and the next thing he knew, there she was.

So whether you believe in the law of attraction or manifestation or not, it does not matter.  The lesson here is to let go of what you think you want.  Stop trying so hard to bring it into your life.  Get clear on what you want and then let go.  Become detached to the outcome and watch what happens.

And join me on Tuesday at the International Association of Law of Attraction Professionals for more.


  1. Michael BryantMonday, November 8, 2010 at 2:35 am 

    great advice, it is important to look at the root of what works. Letting go is very very hard, but also can be very easy.

  2. Michael BryantMonday, November 8, 2010 at 2:35 am 

    great advice, it is important to look at the root of what works. Letting go is very very hard, but also can be very easy.

  3. Dean FitzpatrickTuesday, November 9, 2010 at 9:03 pm 

    I’m a witness to this myself: I too met my wife shortly after letting go of preconceived notions of what I wanted in a mate. The result? Four years and two beautiful kids later I’m enjoying every day with my soul mate. Great post, Alexis! BTW, I heard your interview on BlogcastFM a while back and got a tremendous amount of value. Thanks!

  4. KitFureyWednesday, November 10, 2010 at 4:39 am 

    I enjoyed this post! Adding a thought, too: It’s essential to ALIGN what’s going in the other-than-conscious mind with what we consciously choose. Our conscious mind doesn’t easily override the subconscious, so it’s essential to clear or align the subconscious patterns and beliefs with what we consciously want.

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