You feel bad about wanting it, thinking it or feeling it. Or you’re embarrassed that you do. Or both. And more.
So you just don’t say anything. You hold it in. Stuff it down, maybe. But then your mind twists it all around.
It wants to protect you from feeling bad and definitely doesn’t want to take responsibility for the feeling.
It wants to protect you from disappointment.
So it makes up a story and projects it out on the people around you.
They would never have given you what you wanted anyway. Never could have understood you.
You begin to believe the story and then you begin to see evidence of it everywhere.
A-ha, your mind says! See … it’s a good thing you didn’t say what you wanted because you would never have gotten it anyway.
Suddenly, you are sucked in and life sucks.
You are trapped. Can’t say anything because of the story. And yet you can’t stop thinking about it, that thing you wanted a little bit before, now you really, really, really want it.
And you are more convinced than ever that you can’t have it.
Then it starts to scream. Mine sounds like a child who hasn’t had its needs meet.
The negative self talk kicks in.
“You are trapped. You’re screwed. How could you let yourself get into this situation … again?”
And, of course, your mind tells you it’s not your fault. It’s their fault.
Ready to be free?
Stop playing these mind games with yourself.
There is a solution.
Just say it. Stop judging what you want and what you feel. Express it.
Allow the expression to be without charge. Express it from a place of stillness and without emotion.
This thing you want is not right or wrong, it just is.
Your feelings. Your thoughts. Your innermost stuff you don’t share with anyone. It’s all okay.
As soon as you say what you want, think and feel and take 100% responsibility for those wants, thoughts and feelings, you can drop the story about how “they” are keeping you from having it.
Drama will drop away. Maybe not immediately, but over time as the people in your life who can’t handle your truth drop away.
Start by saying what you are not saying.
Feel free to practice here in the comments. What is something you haven’t been saying because you think you shouldn’t think it or feel it, but you do?
Let’s experience some freedom together.